French Fry Diary 450: Allen's Clam Bar

Allen's Clam Bar, on Route 9 in New Gretna, New Jersey used to be my late father's favorite restaurant. Now, keep in mind, my father was a man who did not go out to restaurants. Once he was retired, he went to McDonald's in the morning for coffee and gossip with the other old men, and would grudgingly accompany the family out when my sister from Nebraska would swoop in once a year - but other than that, he was not a restaurant guy.

My father was a woodsman and a hunter, a farmer and a country boy. I could see how this place in the middle of nowhere would appeal to him. And as I accompanied him on many instructional and fun walks and rides in the woods, I can easily see how he would enjoy the one to two hour drive through the Pine Barrens to get to Allen's.

He and my mom would go there on summer weekends to enjoy the air, and the ride - and I suppose also the food and the ambiance. I had the opportunity to go to Allen's twice. The first time I think was my dad trying to show me what he thought a 'real' restaurant was like, and second was the truly painful experience of the parents taking me and a girlfriend to a 'real' restaurant. I miss my parents a lot now that they're gone, but even in hindsight, this latter trip holds no joy.

Allen's Clam Bar is a place out of time. If I recall correctly, and this is going back nearly three decades, the place had a dirt parking lot and a wood floor porch. The inside was more of a small but empty general store out of the 1920s that someone had awkwardly set up tables and chairs in. Cramped and dusty, although not on the tables, I was greeted by a very simple menu, printed on the placemat. As I recall, the waitresses also exude a rustic Piney charm - take that any way you want to.

The menu consisted of a variety of seafood items, most of them fried, that all came with two sides, the only one of which this catastrophically picky eater would eat was the favorite fried food. On both trips I got the fried scallops and two sides of French fries.

Each of my orders - the scallops, the fries, and the fries - came on a big paper plate, so I had three piled high paper plates. I remember that the scallops may as well have been Mrs. Paul's (nothing wrong with that, I love Mrs. Paul's scallops) were it not for their large size. The fries were definitely from the grocer's freezer (regular or crinkle cut, although pics online may indicate they're now natural cuts) and deep fried in the same oil as everything else, so they had that unique fishy tinge - not necessarily a bad thing.

Allen's Clam Bar is still there, but I haven't been back. I understand why my dad liked it, and I'm sure my folks had good times there. I found some pics of the place online. It doesn't seem like it's changed much. I don't remember the shark though. Maybe I'll get back there someday, and have some fries for my dad.

French Fry Diary 355: Friday Night Fish Food

When you're a little kid you sometimes see patterns but you don't always understand why they are until years and years later. This is one of those things, and of course it's got to do with the favorite fried food.

When I was little, my mom worked second shift so my big sister Bobbie - a notorious but loved early French fries enabler in my life - would make dinner every night. A favorite meal was what my small mind called 'fish food.'

Fish food consisted of a variety of Mrs. Paul's products, then not as soul-crushingly expensive as they are now. Usually there would be fish sticks, deviled crab cakes, fried scallops (my favorite, well, second favorite) and of course, French fries. The fries were usually regular cut or crinkle cut, really the only ones available back then. These were all baked together, despite the various temperatures and times instructed in the directions. They usually all came out all right.

I loved this meal, and still do, as it brings back good memories of my childhood. I didn't realize at the time that this meal usually fell on a Friday night, a holdover of the old Catholic (Mom was raised Roman Catholic) fish on Friday thing during Lent.

Later as an adult living at home, I would make this meal. I got more scientific and precise about temperatures and times. I also found that I liked shoestrings better with the various 'fish foods,' and enjoyed the aroma mix of everything together.

Still, Friday or any time, I still remember and love the fish food meal. Mmmm... fries...

French Fry Diary 195: Red Lobster 2010

Everyone knows the real reason to go to Red Lobster. It's the bread things, the appetizer cheddar biscuits. At least now the folks at RL acknowledge this and are always on top of bringing more when your basket is empty. Unless you say otherwise, your basket will always be filled, and they even are cool about giving you a generous bag of them to take home afterward.

Now if only they would sell them in stores or to go. They could be rich. Bisquick has a biscuit mix that is similar (the Bisquick Complete Cheese Garlic Biscuits) and there are lots of copycats online, but nothing beats the originals. When you go to Red Lobster, don't forget the bread things.

My most recent trip to Red Lobster was for my dear friend Marni's birthday. Her birthday meal at Red Lobster has been a tradition for well over a decade, dating back to when the menu was completely different, except for the bread things. No matter, Marni and I are big fans of the bread things. She even brought me some when I was in the hospital after my kidney transplant - now that's a true friend.

Anyway, after emptying a couple baskets of bread things, like bringing a knife to a gunfight, I ordered a steak at a seafood restaurant. I ordered the steak mostly because of previous experience here (especially since they changed the menu). The RL folks find it impossible to deliver the maple chicken without the rice pilaf. It's like ordering a plain hamburger at Checkers - good luck.

Marni had told me about two items here she thought I would really like - the onion straws and the peach bourbon barbeque sauce. I got some onion straws on my steak. They were thin, lightly battered, and very good, just might have been better a bit crispier. It's too bad they are not officially on the menu as they are very good.

The current French fries at Red Lobster are natural cut shoestrings, a rarity but also very good when you can find them. I got a double order as I didn't want broccoli. I think it was a good choice. These were very good fries. I wish I could say the same about my raw steak, sooo not medium well. You can say I could have sent it back, but I'm paranoid and think it might have returned medium well, but also with an extra special seasoning as well.

The steak was saved however by the aforementioned peach bourbon barbeque sauce that came with Marni's scallops. This sauce had a very interesting taste, sweet and heavy on the peach, and managed to make the steak edible. Excellent for dipping with the fries as well. It should be noted it's also not on the menu. Maybe Red Lobster is working on its own secret menu a la In-N-Out Burger.

I was really kinda having a good time until the waitress spilled hot butter on my legs. I've been accused of being many things, but never a dead lobster. Hey, at least she didn't stand by while I choked like Winnie the Pooh did. Happy Birthday, Marni!