French Fry Diary 667: The Marlton Diner

I have known this building for well over two decades. It used to be the Denny's where dear friend Anne-Sophie waitressed, and where our Rocky Horror group would go after shows. Good times, but long, long ago.

When Denny's pulled out of the South Jersey area, the restaurant was repurposed into the Marlton Diner. As the quality of the food and service at landmark Olga's Diner down the street was going downhill, it was easy for the new restaurant to claim the limelight. And when construction and removal of the Marlton Circle temporarily closed Olga's, perhaps it was the Marlton Diner that put the last nails in Olga's coffin, finally out-dinering the queen of Jersey diners.

When the Marlton Diner first opened, the food was very good, of special note for me the onion rings and milkshakes. Over the years however, and perhaps it's the lack of competition, but the food and service are not what they once were. The Bride and I stopped going altogether when she and her friends got paper sheets in their meat, after it was cooked, and management didn't care, and did nothing.

My friend Marni was having work done on her car at the Pep Boys next door, so, since I had never officially reviewed the Marlton Diner before, I figured I'd give them a second chance, and kill two birds with one stone. First thing I noticed, remembering the old Denny's, besides the slightly smaller seating area than that older restaurant, is the hideous chef statue as you enter. I am sure this thing has given many a child nightmares after eating here. Hideous, and so not appetizing.

The Marlton Diner was nearly abandoned when we went, save for the senior citizen crowd, one of whom was out in the lobby watching the TV both when we arrived, and when we left. Perhaps he was homeless? When we were seated, I found they had Pepsi not Coke, so not a good start. With no one to wait on, we listened the staff talk shop and how much they hate their jobs, and the customers. That's not quite the kind of pre-dinner entertainment I expected, but it passed the time.

I ordered my Medport Diner (the best diner in my area for my money) standby, breakfast potatoes (called home fries here) and onion rings, which in the past had been quite good. The home fries looked great, even the waitress commented so. They were however only semi-warm. And they tasted a bit off, as if they'd been sitting on the grill since the morning. They were very crispily done though. But that doesn't help if they make me sick, ya know? The French fries, which I spied at another table, were, I think, battered and regular cut. No matter, as I recall, the fries at the Marlton Diner were never very good.

The onion rings, which as I said, I remember as being really good, were also kind of meh. Only warm, they also had that vibe of sitting around for a while. Marni, because of her predilection for special ordering, got freshly made food, but it was also only okay. I took most of the home fries and the onion rings home for later. At the old Marlton, and current Medport, reheated potatoes and rings were always pretty good. Not this time. I ended up throwing it all out, as it all tasted off.

This is not high marks for this place. I have avoided the Marlton Diner for a while, and this encounter pretty much cements that I'll continue to do so. Shame.

French Fry Diary 621: Phily Diner

I recently talked about afterparties over at Biff Bam Pop!, ones that go horribly horribly wrong. This entry here is about one much less sinister, or depending on your health outlook, maybe just as bad. We are talking about French fries, after all.

The South Jersey Writers' Group has their official meeting once a month and afterward some of the members get together for an afterparty of sorts at a nearby bar or restaurant, more for pleasure than business, just to talk shop casually, or not. It's just fun, and we also wanted to celebrate a little, friend and Biff Bam Pop! colleague Marie Gilbert had just released her book, Roof Oasis. We had exhausted our welcome and our tolerance of the nearby Applebee's, and Rexy's Bar stopped serving food after a certain time, so we had been looking for somewhere new, and someone suggested the Phily Diner.

The Phily Diner is a cross between a loud sports bar and a typical Jersey diner, and no matter where you look, it's as if neon exploded in there. Sports bar and neon aside, there are still a few of those creepy life-size chef statues around the place to prove it's still a tacky Jersey diner. And remember those fresh off the mimeograph papers we had waaay back in grade school? We even had a couple menus like that. 

The place was surprisingly crowded and loud for a Thursday night. But that being said, we had also retreated from Applebee's because it too was too noisy. One can only surmise that Thursday is party night in Bellmawr and Runnemede. Perhaps because of the crowd and the noise, the service was painfully slow. And when I say slow, I mean sloooooow.

Everyone wanted to help me write the review so potato products were gotten by almost all. Amy Holiday wanted to compare the Phily's Chesapeake fries to the Pop Shop's Louisiana fries. I didn't think there'd be any comparison, as the Pop Shop is the best. They were heavily seasoned waffle fries with white cheddar cheese on the side. A little greasy but very good hot and Amy said they were better with the cheese.

Janice Wilson got the potato skins, very tasty looking half-potatoes well cooked with generous bacon and orange cheddar cheese. They looked really good, but how could they not be, because bacon. Mieke Zamora-Mackay got the chip burger, a burger with, you got it, potato chips on it. She liked it, and it had some chili, sour cream, green onions, and of course potato chips on it. Authors Jennifer M. Eaton, Krista Magrowski, and Jim Knipp might have also gotten potato-ey goodness too, but they were down the other end of the table.

I just got the fries, and as everyone else's food arrived I began to see that everything was waffle fries. I was kinda disappointed as I was looking forward to the steak fries I had seen on the website, but was resigned to the cross-cross potato variety. Imagine my surprise when a plate full of regular cuts arrived in front of me. These were deep fried frozen fries with a wonderful crisp skin and hot soft inside. The chocolate shake I also got was thick and good.

While the food was very good, and the company was excellent, the customer service was not, and the wait was horrendous. It might be better at a different time, but for now, not a good time and we probably won't be returning. Don't forget to pick up Marie's book Roof Oasis and the new SJWG anthology Reading Glasses.

Random Tater Pic of the Day #159

A vintage Jersey diner and a blast from the past - Ponzio's Diner in Brooklawn NJ from back in the day. I was only there once, back in the eighties, and I got, what else?, the favorite fried food.

French Fry Diary 547: Time to Eat Diner, Bridgewater NJ

This fairly famous diner was chosen as the last day breakfast site for the NJ DIS Weekend Meet. Time to Eat is a landmark in the North Jersey area, and it's a very Greek diner as everyone working there I encountered had thick accents. It was packed as per usual for a Sunday morning as most such diners are. I don't think either the DIS folks or the diner folks had any idea how many of us there would be. We arrived late, so the seating was dicey.

I got my diner usuals for breakfast, home fries and bacon. The home fries were shredded potatoes that seriously needed to be cooked a little bit more. I should have done what the bro-in-law sometimes does and ask them to just deep-fry them for extra-crispness. There were random onions, peppers, and maybe scallions mixed in, but far too few to be on purpose, maybe they just slipped in through sloppy cooking. These home fries also got cold very quickly, or maybe they were just cold to begin with.

This was a big order by the way. Again, there is something to be said about portion size at most diners. A side order is only a small order if it's actually a side to a meal, but a side order without an entrée will be huge. They will not skimp on the potatoes, and you will get a full-sized plateful of them. Don't try to test this with bacon however, you will be sorely disappointed.

While the food was not great, diners are about getting together with friends, not food for the most part. Or maybe that's just me waxing philosophical and making an excuse for the really crappy food. It is always nice to meet new folks, and make new friends. The company and the conversation were pretty good, most of it about, you guessed it, Disney.

Random Tater Pic of the Day #81

These disco fries came from a recent meal at the Medport Diner with friends Brian and Taryn.

French Fry Diary 442: Ponzio's Preview

This is more of a review by proxy even though I did get to try some of the fries. So this is more of a Somebody Else's Fries than a proper review, however it's worth noting we'll be back at the end of the year. Ponzio's is where we will be getting together with our friends for the holidays.

It has been a very long time since I've been to Ponzio's, possibly since college, although I had been in their tiny bar once or twice since then. Much like Olga's Diner, Ponzio's is a South Jersey, and specifically Cherry Hill, landmark. It's been at the Ellisburg intersection, and before that the more recognizable Ellisburg Circle, just about forever. I have heard in recent years they had become much more classy and upscale.

After a recent high school reunion at the Coastline, The Bride and some of her friends visited Ponzio's. Thinking of me (and my obsession) as she almost always does, she got some fries, took some pictures and even brought some home for me. Does she love me, or what?

The Bride ordered the Bay Fries, specifically Johnny & Feef's Famous Bay Fries. I do however have to wonder how famous they really are, because they weren't Google-able. These pixie crinkle cuts, with Old Bay seasoning, and white cheese on the side, are startlingly similar to Chickie & Pete's Famous Crab Fries (which are for reals famous). I suppose that's why Ponzio's feels the need to put the words "Better Potatoes Better Seasoning Better Cheese Sauce" almost as if they know you're going to compare them to Chickie & Pete's anyway.

On that comparison, the only thing I can say is once home, while the Ponzio's fries did reheat well both by baking (the best way) and microwave, they were not as resilient as Chickie & Pete's. C & P reheat very well, great treat for the next day - these, not so much. I liked the Johnny & Feef's, but they are still a weaker imitation of the real thing.

I look foreword to our holiday visit to Ponzio's.

French Fry Diary 372: Mastoris

Recently a friend of The Bride's, and a Trenton local legend, Randy Now opened up his Man Cave & Consignment Shop up in Bordentown New Jersey. We, along with her parents, looking for a nice drive to get out of the house, attended the grand opening. Great place, wonderful stuff, and there was a rocking band there opening day. If you're in the area, definitely stop by, it's worth it.

Afterward, we were still up in the Trenton area and we had the munchies, so after much discussion (there are so many different places to eat), we decided to go to Mastoris. This place is legend among New Jersey diners, in fact, it is probably one of the most famous, and the classiest of the New Jersey diners. I had never been, so this was an experience. I have heard both good and bad about the place in my time on Earth so I was interested in finding out for real. I also wanted to try the, duh, what else, the French fries.

Mastoris is a landmark, a piece of history. In existence since the 1920s, it is both a fancy and homey diner with extra rooms for larger parties, fireplaces in each room, and some folks even have their wedding receptions there. And as if to secure your having dessert one way or another, you have to walk through their luscious bakery just to get to your seat. They hit you here or on the way out, you will get dessert. We got a nice table near one of the fireplaces and our waitress seemed very nice and eager to please, especially to prepare our food however we wanted it. Regular readers know that's a plus for me, the catastrophically picky eater.

I was stunned when the waitress handed out the menus however. It was huge. I kid you not, this was a twenty-page menu, plus a two-sided one sheet with today's specials on it. Lifting the menu was a workout. They have to have everything, or at least that's what one would think, based on the menu. I shudder to think what Chef Gordon Ramsey would say. Frequently on "Kitchen Nightmares," that's one of his pet peeves, and he always cuts the menu down to one sheet. Mastoris would probably give him a conniption.

One of the things that Mastoris is most famous for is their cheese bread, and to a lesser extent, their cinnamon bread. Like the restaurant itself, the cheese bread is a thing of legend. I am always hearing stories of folks who will drive for hours to get some of this bread, and then take some home with them as well, thanks in no part to walking out through the bakery, I'm sure. I couldn't wait to be served, especially with that kind of build up. Now I might be blasphemous saying this, but here I go. The cheese bread is good, no doubt, but as far as I'm concerned, the cinnamon bread is to die for. Keep your cheese bread, just leave the cinnamon bread for me, okay?

When my burger and fries arrived (Oh come on now, you knew that was what I was going to get, right? If not, you haven't been paying attention.) the first thing that hit me was the sheer size of it. The burger was gigantic. I had to cut it in half just to attempt to eat it. This is where Mastoris gets an A+ for portion size, with the burger. It was good hot, but not so much when just warm. Despite the size and look of the ginormous hamburger, I have to say, it was only just okay.

The French fries were steak fries, standard from the grocer's freezer and deep-fried. They were really good, as good as those kind of fries get, mind you, and I really would have liked to have had more, but. And this is a big but, so big, Sir Mix-a-Lot would be happy. The fries came in such a ridiculously small portion compared to the giant portions of everything else. Not as small as at Denny's last time, but still. Speaking of the big portions - on everything but the fries - we walked out with five Styrofoam containers, none of them containing fries.

Just so you don't think I'm being psychotic (well, not that psychotic) about the portion of the fries, it should be noted my father-in-law also got the steak fries, and there weren't enough for him either. The mashed potatoes were also quite good, although they weren't from my order.

On a side note, I thought the service was quite good, but my mother-in-law felt it was the worst service she'd ever gotten at Mastoris. She said that they were usually more attentive and personable. I was floored by this. Our waitress was twenty times nicer than at, say a Denny's or an Applebee's, but then again, I guess that says a lot, doesn't it? We must have gotten our waitress on a bad day, I'll have to go back. All in all, it was a good family afternoon dinner. Good times.

French Fry Diary 197: The Medport Diner

The Medport Diner is the pinnacle of the Jersey Diner experience. It's perfect for after a date, after a movie, a theatre show, a school event, a midnight movie, gaming, hanging with friends or just that late night diner run. Nothing beats the Medport Diner.

Nothing beats it even on the food level. Sometimes diner food is iffy, but the Medport is the king of diners, at least in this area. Their fries are natural cuts, a bit thicker than regular cuts, always hot and tasty. The onion rings are big, panko coated with lots of onion. The home fries are scalloped cut potatoes, well done, just like my mom used to make.

All come in big portions and usually come home with me for reheating later, which they do quite well. The Medport is so good that I have trouble deciding which to get. The Medport Diner has innumerable reviews online, its own Facebook page, even an Urban Dictionary entry, but sadly, no website. Still, it's always a fun experience. Recommended.

French Fry Diary 173: Gino's Flashback

Gino's was my first fast food experience. It was first restaurant to move in nearby, even though we all knew there was a McDonalds several miles up the White Horse Pike, Gino's was five minutes away, and right next to the Acme where just everyone did their grocery shopping. How could you miss it?

One visit after a long grocery trip to bring home lunch and I was indoctrinated at a very tender age. I remember loving the fries even then, surely an early sign of the mental illness that troubles me even now.

Gino's was huge then. Even the sign, that of a cartoon football player holding aloft a gigantic bucket of Kentucky Fried Chicken, was huge and one of the highest points in Berlin NJ. The home of the Gino's Giant, the later Sirloiner, and of course the Colonel's chicken held a prominent place in my childhood years.

I remember one traumatic moment when I was five or six when I was given a soda to carry as we left the counter with our take out, and me being a dumb and clumsy kid, I dropped it. I remember it went everywhere when it hit the floor, and I was horrified. Another fond Gino's memory was when a friend had her birthday party 'catered' by Gino's with Kentucky Fried Chicken her parents brought home. That party was the envy of the neighborhood.

The fries at Gino's were long shoestrings, maybe a bit greasy, but always a treat. The novelty of fast food was still a new thing for us hicks back then. The Berlin Gino's eventually closed and later became an Arby's then a Roy Rogers and now it's a Jersey diner, but it has retained its distinctive Gino's structure through the years. Later, when I was in college I noticed they had changed their fries to regular cuts similar to Roy Rogers, not surprising as they had been purchased by Marriott. And then they vanished altogether.

Gino's is still missed, and despite what the new Gino's is trying to do, it's not the same. But I still have my memories. Check out the memories of others here.

French Fry Diary 163: Gino's Is Back!

When folks think of the first fast food restaurant they were exposed to, the answer is usually McDonald's, but for me, and I suspect quite a few folks my age in the vicinity of Berlin NJ, the answer would be Gino's.

Gino's is long gone -until just a few days ago- but that building in Berlin, next to the old now also gone Acme, that was since been an Arby's, a Roy Rogers and now just a regular Jersey diner, will to some folks be forever known as Gino's. It was the first place we all got fast food. It was where most of us had our first fast food hamburger - the Gino's Giant, not the Big Mac or the Whopper. It was the place we first had Kentucky Fried Chicken. It was where we went for lunch after grocery shopping at the Acme on Saturday mornings. It was where the food came from for birthday parties when we were little. And for some of us, it was where we had our first part-time jobs. Gino's left that Berlin location in the seventies, but there was still one or two around, but they all closed in the early eighties.

Imagine my surprise to find that a new Gino's had opened just a week ago in King of Prussia. Opened and looking to franchise by founder Gino Marchetti and his partners the new Gino's is known as Gino's Burgers and Chicken, and you can check them out here at their website, or here at their blog, and shortly I'll be reviewing their fries right here at French Fry Diary. And don't forget to 'like' them on Facebook. Welcome back, Gino's!

And just for the sake of nostalgia, here's one of their commercials from the swinging seventies...

French Fry Diary 128: Sage Diner for Breakfast

The Sage Diner Restaurant in Mount Laurel NJ has been a landmark on Route 73 for over twenty years. It might not have the history of some or be open 24/7 like most, but it is part of the long tradition of Jersey diners. Occasionally the family will get together for breakfast at the Sage, and this time I decided to write it up.

First things first, they seem to be completely incapable of not making bacon any way other than well done. And by well done, I mean little strips of brown charcoal. But, we're not here to discuss the bacon, we're here for the favorite fried food, and in the morning, it's home fries.

The home fries at the Sage Diner are scalloped and chopped up potatoes, interestingly, some with skins. Many places don't do that and it adds to the presentation a bit. They were not seasoned however, and they arrived at the table just barely warm. The potatoey bits were decent but the crispy ones were as crunchy as the bacon. Cook's day off maybe?

This was very disappointing as I have had good breakfast potatoes here before. In hindsight, on previous trips with good potatoes it was not during business hours so perhaps they were cooked fresh then. After this experience I suspect that these home fries were cooked much earlier, kept under a heat lamp and dispensed throughout the morning. Boo hiss.

As I didn't eat most of my serving I took it home. Much later, reheated and seasoned they weren't bad. I guess, just like Charlie Brown's Christmas tree, they just needed a little bit of tender loving care. Or to be finished being cooked, and seasoned...

French Fry Diary 116: Harvest Diner

Dinering is a way of life in New Jersey. You go out for an evening and then afterwards you meet your friends at ‘the diner,’ of which there are several dozen within spitting distance. It was just such an occasion that brought me to the Harvest Diner on Route 130 in Cinnaminson NJ.

Typically my late night potato of choice is the breakfast type. For those outside the Jersey area, late night at the diner is usually time for breakfast, as it is almost morning, and most diners have a 24/7 breakfast menu. And come on, who doesn’t dig pancakes at three in the morning?

That said, the breakfast potatoes at the Harvest are abysmal, quite possibly the worst I have ever had. They were messy, greasy, and cold – not a good combination. And before you ask, no, I didn’t send them back. It’s always a bad idea to send something back in a Jersey diner as you will most certainly get a little something extra in your food, be it from the floor or some bodily function, trust me, either way you will not like it.

The steak fries that accompany most sandwiches and burgers at the Harvest are another story altogether. While these are definitely grocer’s freezer steak fries and deep-fried, there are always good. It’s hard to mess up steak fries, and these are tasty.

To sum up the Harvest Diner, it’s a nice place, a family place and great to hang out after hours, but stay away from the breakfast potatoes.

French Fry Diary 32: Olga’s Diner 1949-2009

Originally it was located in Camden NJ and first opened in 1949. In 1960 they opened the location most people know it by on the circle where Route 73 and Route 70 meet. For sixty years Olga’s Diner was a South Jersey icon and landmark.

Whether you were on your way to Philadelphia or down the shore, Olga’s was the place you met and got together – though if you were local it was not necessarily the place you ate. Being open twenty-four hours it was sometimes where you ended up at four in the morning.

At one time the food must have been good. Supposedly the bakery was legendary. But for as long as I’ve been aware of Olga’s it was not the place to eat. Maybe get coffee or a Coke (although I think they gave you Pepsi no matter what you asked for) but nothing else.

For those wondering about the favorite fried food, they were typical diner fare. Regular straight cuts, probably frozen and then deep fried, and they were replaced by those awful Invisicoat things when that came into style. Bad fries to match the rest of the place.

It has been in serious decline the last decade. Closed due to health violations, pest problems (when it snowed you could clearly see the rats running in the parking lot), seriously defeated by the vastly superior Medport Diner down the road in Medford and the recent Marlton Diner right up the street, for sale several times, seized due to backtaxes, and now, possibly, finally dealt the deathblow of the Circle being demolished to facilitate a cloverleaf.

It looks as if now it will soon be torn down, and South Jersey will lose a friendly and familiar if tarnished landmark. I don’t know if there really ever was an Olga, but we’ll miss her and her Diner. Rest in peace.